The Infamous 3 month Weed Experience

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I made an experiment by spending 3 months without using marijuana for the first time since I got my diagnosis, 3 years ago. It was a great experience to get to know more about my body on and off weed and things like that. But after the first month and a half, my symptoms started to get out of hand, and suddenly I was having terrible explosions and entered a deep depressive state. I had to start another medication, a second antidepressant, with urgency. I don’t blame the weed but it’s undeniable it made a huge difference.

I have Emotional  Unstable Personality Disorder, commonly known as Borderline Personality Disorder. Did I just say “known as”? Dude, people treat me like an alien and I suffer with the stigma every single day of my life but let’s carry on, shall we? So…

I had an opportunity to smoke one time after this relapse and I went 3 days without a panic attack (which I was then having about two or three times/day). I started then the third month weedless (yes, it is as sad as it sounds, dear stoner) and I wanted to go back to smoking mostly because I know that my medications can’t help me stop explosions when they start happening. And sure, the high is a super plus, is great, hell, I love it! But when I’m high I get more functional and can do a lot of the stuff I get disappointed I can’t normally do. So, no need to say how much I hate all the hippie unemployed listening to Bob Marley and driving buses on LSD (this, my dear parents, was YOUR generation – Plot twist!) image that, I don’t know how, still perpetuates.

One of the cool things about the first months is that I found out that, despite my then sober-paranoia, I wasn’t craving it or missing it at all. I was fine without smoking. After two months I thought “alright, now let’s test things on weed because shit is going down”. The new medication didn’t work and made me a little worse.  I just stopped it but don’t worry – I’m smoking my precious  devil’s lettuce, definitely not in the mood of destroying my room screaming (based on recent events) and I’m getting better quite fast on my brand new road to recovery… it’s a wild world, brother…. we’re fierce, though. And I definitely recommend you to take your own breaks (come back to tell me your experience in the comments!).

My doctor and a medical student friend helped me make a little schedule for myself to consume cannabis on a controlled dosage until I get rid of the former remedy in my system, causing the least harm to my body. Like a legal prescribed drug, you know? Yeah… I know. I also did my research on things like maintaining your tolerance levels and controlling quantity, you guys should take a look.

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Scheduled 420’s example

Then I went on with my everlasting research  (some people say it’s because I’m Aquarius – blasphemy!)  and even thought I’m really going through a very complicated life situation, it was the perfect end to my three month experiment. I came back to pot, quality checked (always, guys – this is serious) two days ago and I don’t know where to start. Let’s resume and say that I went from “I lost my will to live” to “let’s think things though and prioritize my health”.

Works well for me.

Thank you so much for reading.
Love,

N.B.

P.S. Don’t forget to leave a comment, just click in the section above the post. Let’s blabb!

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